My summer vacation and how I planned for it (1,818 views)

Here’s how I’m spending summer holidays this time and how I had intended to spent them and then of course about how I planned and about the circumstances prevailing at the time of this great planning!.

It was quite hot that day. I had not slept properly the night before, slept maybe only for an hour and a half if I stretch the definition of an hour. What was I doing all night, you may ask. Well, I was breaking my head over the course material for this esoteric subject called “Mobile communication”. The first time I heard of that phrase – I told myself, “Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy” style: “Don’t panic!” Then I tried to reason it out.

“What’s so tough about this one? Sounds fairly simple doesn’t it (said my stupid half). Let’s put it this way it is ‘mobile’ and it is ‘communication’, so it must be about cellular phones and stuff” That is how far I delved into this “interesting, thought-provoking, totally exhilarating (and other such heavy adjectives)” subject.

Being involved in organizing my department’s symposium – Cressida 2004, I did not find much time to attend classes (I made sure I did not anyway . However, out of extreme interest and owing to my deep passion towards this subject, I forced myself to attend exactly two hours. The teacher was talking about satellites and how they help in communication. I happen to like satellites and anything to do with space etc and I told myself (Well, my stupid half) “This subject is a piece of cake. I can crack it in no time. Why do people make a big deal of it?”

That is how I spent time until 12 hours before the exam. I had gone to a movie the day before. I had come back and casually flipped through the text (one of many). I went straight to the satellites section and finished the unit in two hours.

You might be wondering why I have digressed so much from what I intended to talk about. The fact is I still do intend to speak about that and you should understand that I like to give long preambles to set the stage and of course to make for compelling reading! So let us go on with what we were talking about.

Just as I digressed now, my thoughts suddenly found a juicy thought-line in the middle of pondering over the equations for satellite orbital calculations. The topic my brain wanted me to consider was about the forthcoming holidays (Phew! Here we go). Some things in live are always the same and repeat over and over again. What I am talking about is the tendency of exam-troubled minds to waver from the “interesting-not-so-little-monstrous-equations” neatly printed on “equally-interesting-monstrous” textbooks (Did I use ‘interesting’ in the wrong way? Maybe a preceding ‘un’ will be more like it) and to inevitably choose topics like “what do I do in the holidays?” “How is the next semester going to be” “How not to get stuck in last-minute studies!” etcetera etcetera.

Damn! Why the hell can’t I stick to the topic of discussion? Looks like a chronic disease I’ve to consult my psychiatrist about. By the way, in thinking about, not digressing or rather why I do, am I not doing so further? And by doing so, am I not doing so even more? And by …….. DAMN! STOP!

Heeeheee, as I was saying, Minds do waver a lot to topics like I mentioned above, and mine tends to choose the first one more than anything else. The very thought of which excites the trillions of neurons up there into neurosis driven pandemonium. Well that is for an intelligent biology student to ponder over. As for the rest of us, that translates into me jumping off the chair and grabbing a poor sheet of bond paper (Which had been napping for aeons). Then I put my mind to work on the various things under the sun that I could do in the holidays. I spent two hours this way not realizing that time just sneaked past me. I looked up and back at the sheet and realized as always that it was overflowing with bulleted items.

The list is something like this.

• Go to the gym and work like a bull. Why you ask? Do you think I would really mind flaunting a chick in an open top jeep with a tight muscle hugging shirt with sleeves rolled up half the way to show my biceps and of course the triceps too and my bulging rock-like chest with armor plated abs right below? (It looks a lot like I want to be Suria of Kaakha Kaakha, doesn’t it?

• Work on project X and impress prof Y as soon as college opens for the next semester

• Finish coding for another project and earn billions of greenies overnight.

• Go to coffee day and show off the bi’s (That is a bit too much of planning!)

• Learn C,C++,Java,C#,VB.NET, Python, Lisp, Ruby, Haskell, Prolog, Smalltalk

• I forgot to mention Ada ?

• Pull Linux down to its nuts and bolts and put it all back together and make a custom build named “Elinora core 2”.

• And so on (many more awe-inspiring plans which I’m very good at cooking up)

“Don’t get fooled by the lack of too many points above, I had an a4 sheet overflowing with them on both sides with handwriting the size of 8pt”

Well, I took a smug look at the list (as always i.e. as far back as I can remember, almost). Then with immense satisfaction at how cleverly I had worked out how to spend time during the holidays and with self-adoration about how planned and meticulous I was, I stretched my aching muscles and relaxed my equally tired mind. My eyes suddenly fell upon a round object pasted (or maybe hung) on the wall. Bleary-eyed, I deduced that it must be a clock because the probability of anything else climbing up the wall was extremely low (Grumble, grumble – Too much math spoils your mind, doesn’t it?). The clock said “It’s 3 A.M idiot, what the F**& are you doing?” I said to myself “Oh my god! What the F*&* am I doing!”

Then again I told myself “Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy”-style, “Don’t Panic”. “You finished a unit in two hours and you can finish the rest equally fast or maybe much faster”. Then again like so many times before, my stupid half said “Since we have that solved, why don’t you give yourself a much deserved break? You can wake up early (What was I thinking? It was 3 AM already) and continue”. My better half pondered over this and in a moment of infinite stupidity said “Well, why didn’t I think of that?” and so I did sleep but of course not before setting the alarm to 4:30 AM as any obedient student would do.

“People were chattering like monkeys in the college campus (Am not sure whether they looked like or whether they really were). Everyone was exchanging notes and of course moaning about how crappy a subject “MOBCOM” is. But I, never! How could I stoop as low as to study on the day of the exam, as always I was well prepared and amply equipped with loads of ammunition like blue, black, green, red, pink, yellow ball pens and thick-nib felt-tip sketch pens and of course rulers of two sizes and then spares for all these along with erasers, sharpeners, lead boxes, pencils and the like. The exam bell rang I walked into the hall head held high. I sat in my place and got my sheet from the invigilator who looked at the pile of stationery beside me on the desk with what looked like bewilderment. I told myself, Hah! Who do you think this is? It isn’t some nitwit jack-ass. This is ME! Then I saw the question paper and instantly I could see answers to all questions, thanks to my well prepared and sharpened mind. The last thing I remember is bending down over the answer sheet. Screech screech scratch scratch screech zoom zip zip screech. I sat back and looked at my wrist watch and noticed that an hour and half had gone past. I smiled to myself with extreme self satisfaction! The answer sheet looked a lot like one of Leonardo Da Vinci’s specification sheets for one of his many inventions, filled with intricate diagrams drawn with an eye for perfection and text as elegant as any modern day laser printer can churn out and decoration as aesthetic as can be done with an advanced modern day DTP software. I stood up and walked out of the hall.

But then as soon as I walked out I felt intense heat and extremely bright light and the chirping of birds Maybe god has come down to congratulate me! But wait , what is this annoying beeping sound, did I not turn my cell phone off? Then I felt it, I was being sucked out and the world around me became a dark mist”

Beep Beep Beep (“Wake up you ass, have been shouting myself hoarse for the past two hours! What the hell are you dreaming about” said my clock) Beep Beep ! The morning sun was beating down on my face. It was hot and bright and a crow was cawing right outside my window. I felt quite drowsy and the gears in my brain started to grind forward incessantly. It was then that I realized “Oh my god! I am so screwed! So much so that I could screw up no further!”. The clock said “6:30 AM”. “Oh my god, I’m so screwed”.

In the next two and half hours I used up more adrenaline than the lone agent BJ Blackowitz in the final level of “Return to castle wolfenstein”! It is not that this is new to me as it most surely isn’t to most of us (A special breed, aren’t we? Last-minute-crammers, I would say)

Here is what followed. I went to college at 9:30 AM. The exam was to start in a half hour. People were chattering like monkeys in the college campus. Everyone was exchanging notes and of course moaning about how crappy a subject “MOBCOM” is. And I to myself “And what are you waiting for? Go fall at someone’s feet and beg for some last minute tutelage” I spent the next twenty-minutes like that. Then I opened my bag to check for all the things I would need. Well, the hall ticket – ok, ID card – ok, pen – nope, pencil – nope, eraser – nope! Eeep! I ran like a maniac to the stationery shop and spat some mangled words at the lady there. She gave me puzzled look and then it dawned upon her “Another one of those weird last-minuters who’s forgotten his ammo!”. She promptly brought me all that I needed and I paid for it. I was shaking miserably. I ran into the exam hall sweat pouring in water-falls all over. Another puzzled look and another dawning of understanding and the sheets were pushed into my hands. I saw the question paper and instantly I could make out that is did not look anything like my intended paper. I got up and asked the invigilator who checked the subject code and told me that it was indeed the paper I was to take. Puzzled, I sat down. I might as well have been attempting to write IIT entrance. The last thing I remember is bending down over the answer sheet. Snore Snore zzzzzz zzzzz Snore gurrrr Snore. I sat up and looked at my wrist watch and noticed that an hour and half had gone past. I panicked, however I told myself “Don’t Panic” (yeah “Hitchhikers guide to galaxy – style”). I looked around and saw faces similar to mine around and even more others bent in intense concentration as if it took that look on the face and that leaking of saliva from the corner of the mouth to churn out answers to questions!.

But then I had to write something on the as-yet-not-written-upon-answer-sheet. I pretended to be letting out some methane from a vent conveniently provided (thanks god!) and leaned to the left and caught sight of some equations(pah!) then I tried the other direction and was more lucky , Diagrams! I took a mental snapshot of that. Then I sat down to answer the question “4) Define the law of exponential path loss in a free-space environment interspersed with foliage, also account for diffraction and reflection effects introduced by interfering mountain peaks and man-made structures like buildings and also account for the brewster’s angle. Of course we expect you to derive the final equation.”

Well I knew the diagram (atleast in part) to start with. The answer was something like “ Definition : It is to be noted that cellular instruments emit waves in the higher frequency range of the EM spectrum which are thus susceptible to effects such a diffraction and reflections as can be ascertained by Maxwell’s equations. These waves follow the ….

I needed to put in some flashy equations. But how? I remembered Vivek writing down some greek alphabets for my benefit. So I started like this

1) pick some flashy greek symbols (eta, alpha , beta, phi, gamma, epsilon etc)

2) pick a few flashy math symbols (integral, delta, summation)

3) Pick some subscripted English alphabets that look intelligent – PLfoliage , PLbuilding (BTW PL = Path loss, look at the question!)

4) Cook up a fancy equation

PL(total) = 3/5 (integral) limit eta to alpha (PL(foliage) – PL(building)/Brewster’s constant + summation (4*PI / gamma)

Believe me, that looked very impressive on paper and with the actual symbols thrown in. I really won’t mind if you use these technique yourself but I do expect to be treated in the canteen if you clear the paper and of course not to be bothered in case you do not.

Well then, getting back to my narration, I spent the next one and half hours like this putting my mind to the highly demanding task of making up my own equations. After aeons of arduous work, I stopped to admire my work. I looked at my answer sheet and found that it looked like the splotchy scribbling of a baboon in African jungles gone mad (Now, now I am not sure if there are baboons in African forests okay? So don’t point that out as a flaw! Please people, allow me to go on). The equations however looked very very intelligent and I liked that very much. Lost in deep self-admiration at my ingenuity I did not notice that I had only two more minutes left. I frantically finished the last question and took out a black ball pen and started underlining “Important points” in a hurry. In someplaces , the “important points” had the privilege of having a neat horizontal tear in the page under them. I am sure they must have liked it! (Now, my imagination is running wild, isnt’t it?). Well just before I finished the last two pages the bell rang and the invigilator walked up to me and said “Stop writing”. I was quite determined to finish the job and did not stop. He pulled the answer sheet from under the freaking black ball pen. Now, some unimportant points had the privilege of having a cross – tear. What followed was a 5 second tussle for the answer sheet which concluded only after I was reminded through a threat that they could and in fact would honour my paper with an all-round horizontal tear if I kept this up.

“Well, I told myself. I’m doomed. There goes a paper. An arrear. Oh god! Why me? Why why?”.

I came out hoping against hope that other people hadn’t fared any better and to my relief there were quite a few, In fact they were in majority and that is what makes me still talk about this paper in a manner so light.

It was quite hot that day.

One or two exams later, holidays started.

“Phew! Exams are over finally. What a relief. Now let me look at the list I made for the holidays.” I rummaged through the pile of papers on my desk and found the sheet and after I looked at it for a while, said to myself “Come on now, you have one and a half months to go, that is 45 days, 1080 hours! Give yourself a break and take some time out to have fun”

I spent the next week in the city, going around. I went to Besi-beach, Coffee day and a zillion other places, saw two movies, played a lot of Civ3 etc. Then came the day after these got over.

I looked at list and said to myself “Aren’t you tired after that hectic week? Of what harm is one day lost? Come on now. Don’t be a Mr.Do-it-right!”

I spent the whole day listening to music, reading some e-books, mailing people, reading news online. Then I had a sumptuous lunch and then slept for a while during which I had dreams of dating and I prefer “Alyssa Milano, Jennifer Aniston, Demi moore and the likes”

Then I sat on the comp till dinner, playing more games and writing more mail. Then I went for dinner at Andhra mess and “Orru vettu vettiten”. Then again I got back to the comp and after 11:00 PM I sat down to chat with people online as net is free for me then and of course did all the chores that guys do online.

I woke up late the next day morning and as usual repeated the same thing all over again. I have a feeling human lives are meant to go in circles!

The most productive thing I’ve done so far is going for a Trek with Vikraman and Sridhar (Thanks vik for dragging me away from the comp). I had great fun and plan to do it again.

The second most productive thing is writing this long long blog for your benefit.

Hoping that everyone is stuck in the same routine (diabolical grin),